All Talk But No Walk (love yourself enough)

first_love_yourself_by_kamyar_infinity-d4lgzi5I cannot stress enough on how much boundaries are important in life. Whether it’s in a relationship, marriage, friendship, even among family members. We all need and must have boundaries to remain sane in this insane world we live in. You can say “I’m done” or “I don’t care anymore.” But it means nothing if you’re feet aren’t moving.

At some point in life with anybody there comes a point where the desire to leave becomes greater than the need to stay. Always VALUE YOUR TIME!. Always be aware when you have been in a certain situation for too long and it is time to cut people and certain situations off. ( get them scissors out and get to cutting) Find someone who values your presence. You can say you’re done but like I said earlier, it means nothing if you aren’t taking action. You say you’re done. You forgive them and then they hurt you again. The cycle repeats and this is what we all call INSANITY. No. Hell no. Make them a believer of your words.

I had a friend call me the other day and tell me she was just crushed to pieces because her boyfriend had cheated on her. She said she never understood why because she tried to be everything to him and she loved everything about him, even his imperfections. See, when you love someone you love every single thing about them flaws and all. One thing you should never accept is the cycle in which someone continues to disrespect you, disempower you and diminish your worth.  People will show you through their actions on how they feel about you. Words mean nothing. Words roll off the tongue very easy, it’s the actions that takes effort.  When someone shows you their actions are you aware or are you just painting an image in your head of what you believe love is. What do you tell your friends and family about this person?

My friend had informed me this whole time she had been telling me about him, she was lying. He hurt her that bad. She told me and everyone else that she cheated on him, but she never did. She just wanted to hurt him. There was a void she needed filled that he wasn’t filling  There was no trust or consistency in their relationship. Now, my friend she is a virgin and is waiting for the right person to come along. She thought this person was the right person at one point and she almost took it there with him. She wanted to show him how she felt by letting her guard down and trusting him.

To become so vulnerable and to let your walls down and give yourself to someone you look at as worthy I imagine could be very hurtful. She thought they were getting on a good path and she was ready. In the process of her decision, he was still lying to her. Luckily though, nothing came of that night if you know what I mean. If she would have went all the way with hm her confidence would be completely gone and she’s not about feeling worthless.

So to my ladies, use discretion when going to the next level with someone because once it’s taken there, there is no undoing your actions. Be very careful.  The day after she made this decision her boyfriend got a phone call from another woman. The woman was trying to figure out who my friend was. She had to look at him explain to another woman who she was. He lowered the volume on his phone then decided to leave the room.

She finally found enough strength to leave his ass alone. I honestly didn’t think he got it. See when you keep saying “you’re done” but your actions don’t back it up, it tends to fall on deaf ears and they don’t believe you because they know you’re not going anywhere. You’re just saying that. But she finally left him.  He took her for granted because she stayed too long after saying several times she was leaving.  She showed him. But to the other woman that had the need to question who my friend was,you should leave if you ever have to question who another woman is.  No man who truly loves you will ever put you in a predicament to where you have to question his loyalty or your spot in his life.

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