Is there really a double standard when it comes to men and women embracing their sexuality? In my opinion yes it is, but it’s one I’m not following and don’t believe in. Why? Well let’s get started.
For my ladies, how many of you have been walking down the street and been catcalled?(raises hand) I’ve had my share. To be honest, I cringe in those moments because I do not like BAD attention from anyone else other than my boyfriend. I’ll share a quick story. One day I was walking through the mall with one of my friends. She decided she had to go to the bathroom so I waited outside for her. As I was waiting, a guy from behind me said “aye girl, can I get your number”? I quickly turn around to see who he was talking to. He then walks closer to me and realizes that I was his brother’s ex girlfriend. He quickly apologized and said he never would have said that if he thought it was me.
First to be clear, I will never talk to anyone who addresses me as “aye girl”. It shows me that you didn’t care to learn my name before conversation. This also showed me that I was being objectified. I was never a person to him when he saw me from behind. It wasn’t until I turned around that I became someone to him. The media plays a big part in how women are portrayed.
You see it all the time on television when commercials use women sexually to sell their products. The commercials are harmless of course but women are people as well. ( pause) Just in case you were wondering, I’m in no way shape or form a feminist. (resume). There are two types of women. The woman that gets consumed by men because she’s too available and the one that is desirable but modest.There is a difference between being sexy and being slutty…that’s up to you to know the difference I will say this. A woman that prioritizes her sexual pleasures and desires is scary because she prioritizes herself. She demands that you make room for her at the table of power.
We’ve been told for so long that girls are raised different from boys. Girls were taught at a young age to be respectful and polite and to be a lady. Well what comes with that is sometimes feeling repressed. Boys were taught to be rough and that it was cool to have sex with more than one girl. The double standard starts at home. If you raise girls to be LADIES, you should raise boys to be GENTLEMEN.
There is a song by Beyoncé titled “partition”. Some people were bashing her for the song because she has children and she shouldn’t be conducting herself in such a way. But a woman can be a wife, mother, business woman and still can look sexy and embrace her sexuality. In the video she was dancing and dressed sexually for her HUSBAND, not just any man. . Owning your sexuality is nothing to be ashamed of. Shame can be unlearned when you learn to put your own desires first.
The world is changing now. Women are becoming owners of their own business. Women are demanding to be heard and seen. It is happening now. How is it that women can’t express their sexuality but men do??? No. I refuse to believe that. Men that shun women for owning their power are men that are afraid of a woman’s power. It’s been this way in the workplace with pay raises Women aren’t looked at as an equal.Sexuality is a power and I refuse to hide mine.