Know Your ” WHY “

17021567_1480414921982799_6251595674494059388_n So I’m super excited to be back from my much needed break.  As I’ve talked about in my last blog, I’ve enjoyed vacationing and just coming up with new content since I’ve been away.

As many of you know that read my blog or follow me know I blog about relationships and self love topics. But this time around I wanted to do something different.  Part of having self love is taking care of yourself…obviously….duh. lol.  I want to take you guys along on my journey to that.

So I have a confession…..I have slacked so much in the gym lately. I use to be very good at working out. If I missed a day of the gym I would go crazy. An addiction much?? Yes very much.  But I am now going to get back on track. I know my ” why”. Let me give you a little background on how I slacked off…ugh. Let’s get it….

So back in 2013  I was nowhere near fit. I hated working out because I hated sweating. I had an ex (Tevin) which I’ve blogged about him before.  He was incredibly sexy y’all. He was about 6’2. I’m 5’3 so that was a huge turn on. He had pretty brown eyes and a low haircut and was very fit. mmmmm. so sexy. But anyways, he was fit and I wasn’t.  Me and Tevin were together for a year and a half. I met him my freshman year in college. We would always hang out at his house. We would never go anywhere besides his house. My mom always kept saying ” If he can’t be seen with you in public, don’t be with him in private”. But of course me being young, it just went in one ear and out the other. I just thought I was “in love”.  Boy was I wrong…I dodged a bullet.

After class I would go to his house to visit him. We would order food and just watch movies. Sometime down the line he started making comments about my weight. Like if I ordered a pizza, he would be like ” you don’t want to go out and get something healthier while I eat the pizza since I’m trying to gain weight”or ” Baby, you’re getting chunky”. Just comments like those.  Those comments never bothered me too much because I have tough skin, but the more he kept throwing out comments and then on top of him cheating on me, I ended it.  My self respect and worth is too strong to let anybody stay in my life that does not treat me right. >>>>>>THE DOOR.

So when we broke up, I did what every female tends to do after a breakup. You guessed it. I got my hair cut, I had plenty of girls night out, I even started working out…Now…To be honest, when I first started working out, it was for revenge for all the mean comments he use to make and him being ashamed of taking me out. But then my feelings changed. I started feeling myself a little bit more, I looked in the mirror and I saw progress and suddenly it was no longer about Tevin, It was about me.

So when I got to my body goal weight, I posted a picture up on social media. ( mind you, me and Tevin hadn’t talked for about four and a half months after our breakup. When I posted the picture up, it was not even 10 minutes, he inboxed me, but I ignored it. He then decided to text my phone. I don’t text him back. He calls me, I send his call to voicemail. He leaves me a message asking if he could take me out sometime and that I was looking good and he wanted me back….AS IF….You didn’t want me publicly back then, you don’t want me now.

I was single for about a year and then I got with my current boyfriend. This time going into this relationship with him, I was fit and active and so is my boyfriend. We were enjoying that lovey dovey stage. Going out all the time, vacationing together, etc. With that came “relationship weight”.  He has a high metabolism so he can basically eat whatever he wants and doesn’t gain a pound.  I’m not as blessed as him okay!  I loved being with him and forgot all about working out, well I would say putting it on the back burner. I had a family emergency that caused me to move back home with my family out-of-state. I don’t really have an active family so I wasn’t working out there.  So by the time I moved back with my boyfriend, I had put on a lot of weight. thirty pounds worth!! He noticed it of course but was very sweet about it, which made me love him even more.He always encourages me and pushes me. Even though he is fit, He doesn’t make me feel bad for me slacking off.

My current weight right now is 160. I was so devastated when I stepped on the scale. my boyfriend is like ” it’s just a number go by how you look and feel”. I already know this. Physically I think I still look good, it’s just the number that is getting to me ( I know it shouldn’t) and also how I feel. Some days I can feel so sluggish and I get sleepy easily. I want to be able to have more energy and to get back healthy because I wasn’t before.  So…Now that I’ve gotten candid about my past,you now know my ” why”.

For the next 12 weeks I want to take you guys along on this journey with me. I will be blogging about my progress and just posting things related to my journey. I hope to be an inspiration to others that are on the same journey as me.  As we all should have self love about ourselves. Taking care of your body is part of that. I will be posting three pictures in this post…The first one is when working out wasn’t part of my life at all ( basically when I was with my ex) the second will be when I lost the weight..and the third will be a recent pic of where I am now ( which is at the top of this post) Thank you guys for supporting me. I love you as always.

 

(2013)  Throwback

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(post weight loss)

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